So, you have ADHD: A Survival Guide for Adults with a Late-in-Life Diagnosis
You’ve navigated the labyrinth to receive an assessment and now you know for sure - you have ADHD.
Receiving a diagnosis as an adult - also known as a late-in-life diagnosis - can be a bittersweet moment.
Suddenly struggles with Executive Function, emotional dysregulation and that nagging feeling that you’re not quite living up to your potential begin to make sense.
If you’re an adult who has recently been diagnosed with ADHD, you might be feeling a mix of emotions: relief, validation, confusion, and often grief.
Many of us experience grief for the life we could have lived, if only we had been diagnosed sooner.
As lonely as this may feel, you're not alone. In fact, thousands of adults - especially women - are receiving diagnoses in their 30s, 40s, 50s and beyond.
In this blog post, we'll explore some key areas to help you navigate life with ADHD, and share some tips and advice specifically tailored to newly diagnosed adults.
Understand Your Diagnosis
Acknowledge and lean into your diagnosis. Know that coming to terms with a new diagnosis is an individual process based on your unique circumstances.
Reject the idea that ADHD isn’t real. If you find yourself surrounded by people or media telling you ADHD isn’t real or is overblown - disengage as much as possible. This is not a good use of your limited energy and it certainly won’t help you come to terms with your diagnosis.
Research ADHD. Seek information from credible sources like Centre for ADHD Awareness in Canada (CADDAC) and Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD) in the USA.
While first-person accounts on social media can offer some information and community, there is also less oversight and inaccurate information can spread easily.
If you’re a woman with ADHD, specifically research ADHD and how it presents in women.
Be aware that the diagnostic criteria for diagnosing ADHD in the DSM-V does not fully account for ADHD challenges with Executive Function nor Self-Regulation. Furthermore, the assessment process still focuses on characteristics in children, and specifically boys though much advocacy is being done to update this.
Decide If Medication is Part of Your Treatment
Discuss treatment options with a primary healthcare provider like a Psychiatrist or Family Physician. Medication can be effective in managing symptoms for many adults with ADHD. It’s important to also recognize there is no magic pill that will make your ADHD symptoms disappear. There are also risks that come with taking medication, periodic medication shortages and inequities in accessing medication.
Keep a journal to track your medication's impact on your daily life and mood, and communicate any concerns or side effects with your primary healthcare provider.
Recognize the limits of what medication can do. Medication cannot teach positive coping skills. According to CADDRA, Psychosocial interventions are just as important as medication for effective treatment
ADHD Therapy and Clinical Coaching can be helpful to process difficult feelings, and to develop your toolbox of positive coping skills and strategies respectively. A competent and qualified practitioner will focus on helping you build up your own sense of self-efficacy.
Recognize the Power of Your Mindset
Don't be too hard on yourself; ADHD is one part of who you are. At the same time, you are more than your diagnosis.
Self-acceptance is the most important part of treatment. Recognizing that your life will always be impacted to some degree by ADHD can paradoxically make it easier to forgive yourself during your “ADHD moments”.
That said, ADHD isn’t a '“get-out-of-jail-free” card. While we envision and are actively working towards a world that is more inclusive of neurodivergence, we also need to be pragmatic and take accountability for the impact of our own actions. ADHD is real but it’s not realistic to expect the world to change overnight for us.
Build a Support System
Share your diagnosis with close friends and family who can provide support and understanding.
Body-doubling is all the rage in the ADHD space. Find a supportive person who is willing to be there with you when you need to stay on task and get stuff done.
Consider joining ADHD support groups or forums, where you can connect with others who have similar experiences. Social media can be helpful but it is easy to get overwhelmed in this space.
Reach out to a professional who specializes in ADHD for personalized support. Look for a provider with lived experience if that’s important to you.
Self-Care and Coping Strategies
There are infinite numbers of tools and resources marketed toward folks with ADHD. It can be easy to feel overwhelmed by this. Try to pick one strategy that appeals to you and give it a fair shot before evaluating if it actually works.
Embrace mindfulness, meditation, and yoga to help manage anxiety and stress often associated with ADHD. Join the waitlist for the 8-Week Mindfulness Program here (available to folks globally)
Recognize the importance of exercise, a healthy diet, and good sleep for maintaining focus and emotional balance. Yes, it can be boring but it is also a game changer. You can find ways to gameify exercise.
Engage in activities that allow you to be creative and bring you joy. Too often we forget that we are allowed to do things that make us feel good. There’s no need to suffer by denying ourselves.
Explore Career and Education
Identify your strengths and consider careers that align with your interests and abilities.
Be open to change; if your current job or educational path doesn't fulfill you, it's okay to explore new opportunities
Communicate your needs with your employer or professors and seek accommodations if necessary. However, recognize that unfortunately not all work spaces are safe to disclose due to prejudice and misunderstanding about ADHD. Try to feel out the culture before disclosing
Being diagnosed with ADHD as an adult is a life-altering event. While living with ADHD is a challenge, it's also an opportunity to better understand yourself and learn strategies and skills that support a healthier, happier you.
